House of cards

I build, with care

My house so fine

I think and plan

And draw the line

Slow and sure

My house it rises

Then a gust of wind

And down it crashes

I curse, and sigh,

the house is gone,

The scattered cards lie round,

forlorn

A heap so small,

almost not there

My house it stood 

So tall and fair

It is a choice

I have to make

Shall I re-build?

A fresh chance take?

It may stand long

It may just fall!

Do i want to try

Give it my all?

Fresh dents in it

The breezes make

Even sheltered; Yet

the risk I'll take

Knowing full well

Dear Lord of all

My house of life

may, like cards, fall

Fake spirituality

The parable of the wheat and tares makes it clear that till the end of the age, there will be people who mimic spirituality and holiness but are actually far away from them. That has always seemed a sad thing to me - so near, and yet so far. Why mimic the real thing, when you can just be - or try to be, genuinely - that way? How sad to be so close to God's kingdom, and yet never enter. And sometimes I am scared when I see some people - on the surface so righteous, so holy, but suddenly their inner and family life is exposed and it is frightening - how very far they are from doing what is right. I'm not talking of struggling with sin and sadness and struggles and temptation to short-cut...I'm talking, I think, of when we stop struggling...and just cover up the lack of struggle....

Doing the right thing

How does one know, in any situation what to do? How should one choose? This is one of - or the most - important thing to learn in life as one becomes an independent adult. Unfortunately, the lesson unlearns itself every now and then and we remain at a standstill, tormented by our choices, unsure what to do I remind myself - we choose by making the best moral choice. The right thing. We figure out, in each case, what is the thing that would bring the most goodness and grace to everyone concerned - NOT just me. Doing the right thing is sometimes costly. But not doing it is even more costly - we lose peace of mind, the chance to bring goodness and healing in our little part of the world - and we lose a clear conscience - the most valuable things in the world.

just finished reading "The palace of Illusions" by Divya Bannerjea Divakaruni - a retelling of the Mahabharat from Draupadi's point of view. First impression - I really enjoyed it. DBD is a good writer and with various techniques - dreams,conversations, visions - she has managed to tell a lot of the complex, tale-within -tales epic. She has made Draupadi a flesh-and-hot blooded woman. Next -dharma and adharma, curses and karma - honour and dishonour, how replete our epics are with them! Problem is, we still live by those tenets of a by-gone world....Dharma and adharma I can see as dynamic, concepts that can adjust to today's context - but curses/ karma/ dis-honour - I wish we were rid of all these!!

Nursing and administration - quite a close link

A BSc nurse made history, yesterday by becoming the first nurse to crack the IAS exam/ barrier. More power to her and the nursing community of India, including those from my own state of kerala. These women are the salt of the earth. Despite many hardships, (many come from middle-class, multi-child families) they practically run India's hospitals and medical care systems. These are sadly, far from perfect,but I say with complete truth, that they would be a thousand times worse if it were not for the dedicated and selfless service of these women. They hold it together - quite a feat, really. Its not surprising the young nurse made it to the administrative services - nurses are good at administration. They may not speak feminist jargon, but by taking responsibility for their families, and the wider community of sick people from every strata, they are displaying the kind of maturity and mental toughness that marks the truly remarkable human being. My salute to them!

Turning merit and reservations around. ...

Both the first and the second spots in the Indian Administrative services examination went to women this year; an encouraging performance by them. Out of the successful candidates, the male-female ratio was not so good, about 6 to 1, but it would be interesting to know the ratio at application level. I have a feeling far fewer women apply at all for the IAS, only the rather more serious and qualified ones; and the ratio of successful to non-successful women applicants may be therefore higher than the male. In any case, girls are getting in on their own merit, and it is encouraging to see. As far as I know, there have been no reservations for women in the services. Meanwhile, an interesting twist to the difficult merit - reservation issue. The prinicipal of St. Stephen's College suggested the college reserve 40% of its seats - for men!! As is the case in many medical colleges, as well, girls apparently outnumber boys almost 60 to 40 in most disciplines in the college, an erstwhile men's college. So is there a place for reserving seats for men? A related question - should girls' colleges open themselves up to allowing men to enter and risk men taking over the seats, as girls are doing st Stephen's? Before deciding about that, one would need to know why men are not getting into the college. Its almost impossible to tell, but some possible causes are - boys go abroad to study rather more than girls do, still; is it that the brightest boys are therefore not applying at all? Secondly, males still prefer hard-core professional courses like engineering to even pure science or the arts - which form the bulk of courses at Stephen's. So, is the reduced presence of men an indication merely of their own choice? Finally, reservations make sense only when the group needing reservations has been oppressed or discriminated against; and require support in order to reach their full potential. For men to claim that they are the discriminated -against gender requiring reservation - well, that's funny at one level and just pathetic at another. Its also illuminating - and irritating - that while for generations women have been under-represented at every possible forum without anyone bothering too much, as soon as male dominance ceases in one little area, there are people ready to make it into an issue.

Mama, main badi hoke pilot banoongi....

Suddenly I have so much to say!! Maybe its just been long. Or maybe I had "gender fatigue as well, and needed a break for a while :-) But of late, have been itching to write these things down, again, before they disappear into the black hole of my mind or the newspaper archives. The gender bias around is not limited to ignoring middle-aged and elderly women, as (even) the Hindu did to Vimla Bahuguna. It's very much there, for instance in the armed forces. Look at this ad : http://nausena-bharti.nic.in/pdf/pilotobserver/Adv.pdf The Navy apparently does not think women can pilot planes. Thus despite women being in aviation for the last 100 years and many armies and air forces around the world having women who fly fighter planes, as well a transport craft and helicopters. Why is it an issue? because like many young boys, many young girls dream of being pilots!! As the recent ad picked up on "Mama, main badi hoke pilot banoongi.." "So did i dream, and so did our daughters. In fact, if that naval ad had been for women at pilot entry, I'm pretty sure both our daughters would have been excited. I had hoped, once, that these archaic restrictions would have ceased by the time they reached the age...well, there's still hope...